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Signs that read Drug Free Zone are proselytizing on behalf of the drug-hating religion of Christian Science. We should not want to be free of drugs in cases where they could be useful -- which are potentially legion in a sane world.
Dr. Scumbag, you're wanted in the penitentiary. Dr. Scumbag to the penitentiary, please.
FRIDAY: My name is Friday. I carry a drug testing 1 kit.
I had just gotten the call from headquarters. It seems some children in a Van Nuys hospice center were being given morphine to treat some quote unquote severe pain. I thought I'd check out the report. If doctors are really dealing junk to children, heads have got to roll.
So thinking, I turned to my partner Frank and said...
Chop-chop, baby. There's a report of some bigtime drug abuse at Panorama City Medical Center.
FRANK: Panorama City Medical? Isn't that in a drug free zone?
FRIDAY: That's right, Frank. It's practically right across the street from Ranchito Avenue Elementary School.
FRANK: Yeah. Those drug dealing scumbags will be eligible for the death penalty if we catch them trying to dope up those helpless kids.
FRIDAY: Turn on the light show, Frank, my scumbag radar is going off.
FRANK: Say, what is a hospice anyway, Joe?
FRIDAY: A hospice? I don't know exactly, but it's obviously some kind of hospital.
FRANK: Whee doggie, you mean we're going to be arresting doctors?
FRIDAY: That's right, Frank. At least if we can keep ourselves from shooting them in cold blood when we see them dealing junk to the unsuspecting children.
2:38 P.M. We arrived at the hospital and made a self-righteous beeline for the Admissions department, where we were greeted by the receptionist.
RECEPTIONIST: How may I help you, gentlemen?
FRIDAY: We're looking for the Hospice Center.
RECEPTIONIST: Upstairs and to the left. Next?
FRANK: I'm with him!
RECEPTIONIST: All right, keep your shirt on. Jesus.
FRIDAY: 2:39 P.M. With guns drawn, we ran up the stairs and out into an open area full of hospital beds where we stopped to reconnoiter.
FRANK: I give up, Joe? Where exactly is this hospice center? All I see is a bunch of sick children.
FRIDAY: Did you say sick children, Frank?
FRANK: Yes, I did, Joe. Why?
FRIDAY: Then this must actually BE the hospice center.
FRANK: Good catch, Joe. What now?
FRIDAY: Now we just hide ourselves behind this water cooler and wait for a doctor to come along with the goodies.
FRANK: How can they do it, Joe? I mean, the kids are already sick. And now they want to turn them into addicts as well?
FRIDAY: I know, right? But get behind the water cooler so that we can catch them in flagrante delicto.
FRANK: In fragrant what?
FRIDAY: Never mind, Frank, just hide.
2:41 P.M. We waited for what seemed like hours but was actually only three minutes. Finally our patience was rewarded as a doctor walked in carrying a very suspicious looking syringe.
GIRL: Doctor, it hurts.
DOCTOR: Don't worry, sweetie. This will make you feel better.
FRANK: No it most certainly won't. Drop the syringe now!
DOCTOR: Who are you?
FRIDAY: We're your worst nightmare. Now drop the syringe and come away from the little girl.
DOCTOR: But she's in pain.
FRANK: The nerve of this guy, trying to use the little girl's unfortunate medical condition to excuse his own sordid drug pushing.
GIRL: What's happening?
FRIDAY: Everything's fine, honey. This man isn't going to bother you ever again.
2:55 P.M. We arrived back at headquarters with scumbag in tow. Our lab guys verified that the syringe was indeed filled with medical-grade morphine 2 , enough to bring peaceful sleep to dozens of hospice kids, thereby turning them into mindless junkified addicts for life.
FRANK: When will folks learn that drugs are not the answer, Joe?
FRIDAY: Hopefully not before December 31st, 2045, Frank.
FRANK: Why's that, Joe?
FRIDAY: Because that's when I retire from the police force, Frank.
FRANK: Oh.
ANNOUNCER: On November 9th, trial was held in the superior court of Los Angeles county. The scumbag was found guilty of 7 counts of drug possession, drug dealing, and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. He is currently on death row. In a strange twist, the hospice is reporting an unusually high rate of deaths among their young clientele. Police theorize that the creep was not only injecting kids with drugs, but with contaminated drugs at that.
Almost every mainstream article about psychology and consciousness is nonsense these days because it ignores the way that drug prohibition has stymied our investigation of such subjects.
The worst form of government is not communism, socialism or even unbridled capitalism. The worst form of government is a Christian Science Theocracy, in which the government controls how much you are allowed to think and feel in life.
Governor Kotek is "dealing" with the homelessness problem in Oregon by arresting her way out of it, in fealty to fearmongering drug warriors.
The FDA is not qualified to tell us whether holistic medicines work. They hold such drugs to materialist standards and that's pharmacological colonialism.
For those who want to understand what's going on with the drug war from a philosophical point of view, I recommend chapter six of "Eugenics and Other Evils" by GK Chesterton.
"My faith votes and strives to outlaw religions that use substances of which politicians disapprove."
Folks point to the seemingly endless drugs that can be synthesized today and say it's a reason for prohibition. To the contrary, it's the reason why prohibition is madness. It results in an endless game of militaristic whack-a-mole at the expense of democratic freedoms.
Being less than a month away from an election that, in my view, could end American democracy, I don't like to credit Musk for much. But I absolutely love it every time he does or says something that pushes back against the drug-war narrative.
I thought mycology clubs across the US would be protesting drug laws that make mushroom collecting illegal for psychoactive species. But in reality, almost no club even mentions such species. No wonder prohibition is going strong.
In "How to Change Your Mind," Michael Pollan says psychedelic legalization would endanger young people. What? Prohibition forces users to decide for themselves which mushrooms are toxic, or to risk buying contaminated product. And that's safe, Michael?
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