How Drug Warriors Steal American Elections
by Ballard Quass, the Drug War Philosopher
October 27, 2019
[standup]
Welcome back to the DEA Lounge!
[applaud]
How many people realize that American elections are fixed? Let's see a show of hands.
[gasp]
You heard me. American elections are fixed, and they have been fixed for the last 40 years.
[gasp]
How? No, it has nothing to do with the Russians. It's because the Drug War, each year, is locking up almost a million left-leaning voters.
[gasp]
Think about it. The folks that we're arresting for mere drug possession were never going to vote for conservatives, so it follows that it is in the conservative interest to keep the Drug War going full tilt, to keep a million left-leaning Americans off the voting rolls every year.
[gasp]
This is why the Drug War goes on, because we're arresting all the voters that would throw the Drug Warriors out of office.
[boo]
Nowadays, we see national elections decided by mere thousands of votes -- so just imagine the enormous benefit that Drug War conservatives receive when a million of their opponents are removed from the voting rolls every year thanks to a felony charge for possession.
[gasp]
Did I mention that this actually bothers me?
[applaud]
This is why, far from apologizing for being mad, I urge my fellow Americans to become as pissed as I am.
[applaud]
As for the Christian Science narcs in the room, relax. I'm just suggesting -- merely hinting -- that you just possibly might want to consider a career that does not entail the corruption of American elections and the denial of basic rights to your fellow Americans, that's all I'm saying. Just think about it. Just think that you might possibly (just maybe) want to stop ruining a million lives a year, thereby subverting American elections. Fair enough?
[laughter]
As for the rest of you lot, enough with the oh-so-cool cynicism about civic involvement. Hop out of the urine-testing line and complain for a change!
Baaaa!
All right, who just bleated? Don't make me come out there!
Ten Tweets
against the hateful war on US
AI is inherently plagiaristic technology. It tells us: "Hey, guys, look what I can do!" -- when it should really be saying, "Hey, guys, look how I stole all your data and repackaged it in such a way as to make it appear that I am the genius, not you!"
If we let "science" decide about drugs, i.e. base freedom on health concerns, then tea can be as easily outlawed as beer. The fact that horses are not illegal shows that prohibition is not about health. It's about the power to outlaw certain "ways of being in the world."
Our tolerance for freedom wanes in proportion as we consider "drugs" to be demonic. This is the dark side behind the new ostensibly comic genre about Cocaine Bears and such. It shows that Americans are superstitious about drugs in a way that Neanderthals would have understood.
When is the Holocaust Museum going to recognize that the Drug War has Nazified American life? Probably, on the same day that the Jefferson Foundation finally admits to having sold out Jefferson by inviting the DEA onto his estate in 1987 to confiscate his poppy plants.
Here is a sample drug-use report from the book "Pihkal":
"More than tranquil, I was completely at peace, in a beautiful, benign, and placid place."
Prohibition is a crime against humanity for withholding such drug experiences from the depressed (and from everybody else).
Don't the Oregon prohibitionists realize that all the thousands of deaths from opiates is so much blood on their hands?
Just saw a People's magazine article with the headline: "JUSTICE FOR MATTHEW PERRY."
If there was true justice, their editorial staff would be in jail for promoting user ignorance and a contaminated drug supply.
It's the prohibition, stupid!!!
The drug war controls the very way that we are allowed to see the world. The Drug War is thus a meta-injustice, not just a handful of bad legal statutes.
There will always be people who don't use drugs wisely, just as there are car drivers who don't drive wisely, and rock climbers who fall to their death. America needs to grow up and accept this, while ending prohibition and teaching safe use.
The FDA will be accepting comments through September 20th on the subject of ways to fight PTSD.
PTSD@reaganudall.org
Ask them why they support brain-damaging shock therapy but won't approve drugs like MDMA that could make ECT unnecessary.
Click here to see All Tweets against the hateful War on Us
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Copyright 2025, Brian Ballard Quass
Contact: quass@quass.com
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